13
Sep
08

fears of commitment ~~ 08/24/2006

I know how you must feel.
the fears so intense, it’s so real.

I know how I do feel.
Love is an animal, looking for a meal.

We are backed into a corner
Scraping, fighting, clawing.
don’t want to love, battered and torn.

I don’t think we have a choice.
Two previous lovers left us howling.
We fixed ourselves up, finding joys.

Through it all, I was there.
When your heart broke and fell apart
I tried to show you how much I care.

I knew you needed time
so we drifted apart.
I dreamt of you being mine.
To love, with all my heart.

Some time later, you came back to me.
I couldn’t believe my luck.
I had thought I’d become a distant memory.

We tried together, to go down this road.
We enjoyed our physical loving,
but we both still carried a heavy load.

Not sure why, but you had to flee,
Was there another woman?
One who is better than me?

My life is complicated, fraught with kids.
Could this other woman be more simple?
My life would make even me put on the skids.

Is there no other woman?
Just your knowing what my life is?
Making a choice, that you can’t be my man?

You’ve got a game plan.
One, that try as I might,
I can’t see that it includes me, damn.

I have to make a decision of my own.
To take what you give and give what I can.
Enjoy the ride, let it flow, I”m fully grown.

I can see the writing on the wall,
I can see where I’ll end up, but
even I can’t stop the fall.

Despite all my attempts to not,
I couldn’t help myself, I love you.
My hands and heart tied with knots.

I look into your hazel-green eyes,
and can see the pain clearly.
If you could but let me, don’t say bye.

I want to show you how much love I have,
I want to tell you about how good it could be,
Yes, there may be problems, but plenty of laughs.

Maybe it’s just not meant to be.
Even with the love that is there,
Maybe it’s not happily-ever-after for you and me.

I wish I may, I wish I might,
have you to love, all through the night

But all my wishing, hoping and praying
won’t change a thing.
The only one who could is you.
BUt I don’t hear your saying
That you, too, are wanting.

I don’t hear what I need.
I try and keep asking,
but the answers aren’t there.
I can only plant a seed.

I will be here, just waiting.
SO whether it’s another woman or not,
you won’t see me hating.

All you have to do, is take a step.
To grab my hand and heart.
I’ll do waht I can to make you happy,
my heart is yours to be kept.

DO what you will,
but know that no matter what
you’ll always give me a thrill.

I’ll always love you,
that I can’t change.
Hopefully, one day, you can love me too.

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